Each item comes from a TikTok video she has either been tagged in or that she has come across herself, and she stitches them with a screen recording of her opening her iPhone Notes app to add it to her list.
Arias was initially worried that people would be offended by her posting about the negatives in this way, but her videos have been well received. “I feel like this list brings everyone together and gives them a chance to share their stories and perspectives,” she said.
Though Arias hasn’t had any children and doesn’t plan to, she said she has witnessed firsthand most of what is on her list and that it has been really easy for her to realize there’s more to kids than just being cute.
“I’ve seen parents struggle to adjust to a parenting lifestyle, and it’s tough,” she said.
She was not surprised by the videos becoming so popular; she knew these were relatable to everyone in one way or another. For some people, the videos have served as a reminder to take their birth control. For others, the comment section has become a place to share their painful experiences.
“I have also had many mothers say that they never knew someone else that has gone through the same traumatic birth experience as they did until they read my list and told me how it has made them feel less alone,” Arias said.
Despite all the cons, she said she is a child advocate. In fact, there are 35 reasons on her list in favor of pregnancy, with the first being “Child?” and the second being “Kids be funny I guess.”
“They are my passion — but given how things are right now, bringing a child into this world shouldn’t be a huge priority,” she said.