Rude Traveller Gives Custom Agents A Hard Time And Insists Things Be Done “By The Book,” So They Get Satisfying Revenge And Make Him Unload His Own Vehicle

Most people out there working every day, interacting with others, just want to do their jobs and go home.

Unfortunately, there are people out there who just want to make our lives difficult some days.

OP worked for customs and border control.

I work for my country’s customs administration. We basically do what you would expect.

Anything that comes into my country is subject to duties, levies & taxes and the goods can be inspected to ensure all the paperwork filed actually conforms with reality.

Normally, they treated personal vs business travelers differently.

Certain differences exist between private and commercial goods. Most private goods are not subject customs duties (exceptions being meat, alcohol, tobacco and a few other products).

But other than that, customs law applies in every aspect to both commercial and private entities crossing the border.

Meaning that many regulations usually reserved for truck drivers and professionals can easily be applied when it comes to private individuals.

This was something a particularly nasty traveler had to realize, when he bumped heads with my superior.

When a guy came through determined to get his own way, though, they did what he asked.

I was working a night shift at a rather small border station in the north of my country, where me, a colleague and my superior had activated an irregularly manned border station (not all border stations are permanently manned and opening a border station outside of its assigned working hours is referred to as ‚activating’ it).

It was 03:40 in the morning and we didn’t see too many cars. The ones that crossed over were foreigners who drove into our country for work. Many of them lived in the border region, knew the procedures and played ball.

Some were friendly, some a bit grumpy (unsurprising if you have to get up that early). But all of them did as we asked. Show some identification, answer our questions about what is in your vehicle and maybe endure us taking a look inside.

And then it arrived. A black Porsche Cayenne (until then I didn’t even know that Porsche made SUVs). In the Porsche was Mark (not his real name).

Mark basically looked like Christian Bale looked while playing Patrick Bateman in the movie ‚American Psycho‘. The suit, the haircut, his briefcase…everything indicated that he had money and wanted people to know about it.

Which is fine. People should enjoy having nice things and signaling is a part of social interaction. We treat everyone the same and we expected this encounter to go as uneventfully as the previous ones.

Boy were we wrong.

We nicely asked him for his ID card or passport, which he handed over. We then asked Mark what he was transporting in the car (when he stopped we saw that there were several cardboard boxes in the trunk and on the back seat), which he answered with „I don‘t see how that is any of your business.“

And cost him a good portion of his early morning in the process.

Bad mistake.

It was in fact not only our business, but the very nature of our job. And since Mark had not only failed to answer, but had also failed the attitude test, we ordered him to open the trunk.

He got out of the car and opened his mouth again.

“I will open the trunk. But just so you know, I want this done by the book. You touching my stuff is unacceptable to begin with. So if you damage anything or I find as much as a smudge, I will put you in a world of hurt. Now confirm that you understood me. Now.“

At this point my superior stepped forward.

“We have understood you quite well. Now I just need to know whether you were serious when you said that you want this to be done by the book? Can you confirm that you want this done by the book?“

Mark then sealed his fate by answering in the affirmative, upon which my superior updated him on the situation.

“Splendid. According to customs law, the person crossing the border is responsible for opening and unloading the vehicle he or she drives, must unpack all containers, present the goods for inspection, repackage them and reload the vehicle.

When it comes to non-commercial crossings we usually do all that, as not to inconvenience private travelers, but since you want this done by the book you will have to do it. Failure to comply allows me to keep you and your vehicle at this border station for as long as I want.

Any kind of resistance allows me to restrain you. And now get to work. And make sure you don’t accidentally damage your own car or its contents.“

Mark then had to lift several cardboard boxes filled with all kinds of personal items (it appears he was moving apartments) into the border station, had to unpack all of them, lay out the contents piece by piece for inspection, repackage everything and reload his car.

Had he simply answered that the boxes contained nothing significant, we would have taken a quick glance into the trunk and he would have been on his way after 3 Minutes.

This way the whole procedure took 35 Minutes and left some nice sweat stains on Mark‘s shirt.

He filed a complaint…the complaint was dismissed…since everything was done…by…the…book.

So many people struggle with the attitude test.

I mean you just have to be nice!

It’s kind of an unwritten rule.

This guy definitely FAFO.

Nobody wants to have a bad day, right?

This guy should have learned something that day.

I bet he didn’t, though.

If you liked that post, check this one about a guy who got revenge on his condo by making his own Christmas light rules.