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“One time, we snuck into a random wedding on accident, and they let us stay for the reception. I think some people thought we were the groom’s cousins. It was the [wildest] party I have ever been to. There was enough food to feed the entire resort — TWICE! There were three different wedding cakes. The bride and groom must’ve been somebody really important with a lot of money. We danced all night, and the music wasn’t even that bad. Not ‘The Cha Cha Slide’ or ‘Cupid Shuffle.’ A guy I think was the bride’s dad was so drunk he kept falling over and crashing into tables — knocking glasses over. I think he paid for everything, so nobody stopped him. I never want to get married, but I wouldn’t mind having a party like that.”
“We got back to our resort room at 3 a.m., and my mom didn’t believe us. She insisted we were doing drugs with people on the beach. I don’t even know where she got that story from. Finding random people to give us free drugs would be just as random as crashing a wedding party.”