21.
“When I realized that they did not know me, and preferred their assumption of who I was to fit their scenario, because anything else would mean they would have to admit they did not participate in any way with the caregiving to other family members and in my life. I’m reminded of a phone call from my auntie who said, ‘He who does all the work gets 100% of the blame; you do nothing, you’re not to blame.’ At the time, I didn’t understand her and said, ‘Oh, that would never happen.’ She was right. Essentially, I realized my feelings did not matter to them — that was a mind-blower when I knew for sure I didn’t matter. I had always been there for my loved ones, but they never were for me.”
“They had not been present in my life for a long time. I kept trying to be open and keep the door open, hoping maybe we could have a relationship, hoping to be loved and thought of, but the light came on, and there was no point in pretending anymore. Once I got to that point, I left the guilt behind and cut the cord. It was the love and care of my friends that helped me see that I was okay and worthy of love, not my blood relatives.”
—Anonymous, 65, Washington
Source: https://www.buzzfeed.com/ravenishak/breaking-point-with-family
