‘Oh she’s beautiful, but not as pretty as my Sofia.’ Should This Uncle Apologize For Lashing Out At His Niece After Her Mother Keeps Bragging About Her Daughter

This is one of those situations where all of the adults are wrong and everyone feels badly for the kids – so buckle up.

OP and his wife are new parents. His sister has a 10yo daughter who is a model/actress and who is the apple of her mother’s eye – perhaps too much so.

My wife, “Emily,” gave birth to our lovely daughter 5 months ago and she is just a joy.

My niece (10), “Sofia,” is a pretty successful child model. Since the age of 2, she’s been on billboards, commercials, clothing advertisements, etc. She’s done work for many well-known brands and her career seems to blossom.

My sister, “Nina,” is very proud, understandably, of her daughter. Every time Sofia books a gig, Nina immediately texts the entire family about her daughter.

She’ll “subtly” brag to us about how successful her daughter is, how she’s paying for the water bill at 10 years, or how Sofia is the true “star” of the family. It can be annoying, but it’s harmless for the most part.

His sister cannot seem to stop talking about how pretty and successful her daughter is, how she’s destined for great things, etc etc etc.

Since Emily and I gave birth, Nina has been making passive-aggressive comments about our daughter’s looks.

For example, when we first shared a picture of our newborn daughter in the family group chat, Nina replied with, “Oh she’s beautiful, but not as pretty as my Sofia.”

Or, when my mother made an offhand comment about how she already resembles my wife, Nina said, “Yeah, they share the same “unique” features.” (She was not saying “unique” in a kind way).

These are only a few examples.

For the most part, I’ve been able to brush these off. It’s not worth something starting a big fight over.

Which OP can handle, but when his sister insulted his baby’s and wife’s looks more than once, he blew up.

Nina and Sofia came over last weekend. Now, I’ve been a bit distant from Nina since I’ve had my daughter. Her comments about my daughter’s appearance and passive-aggressive digs at my wife have not sat right with me. However, I thought to extend an olive branch since she really wanted to see our daughter.

We had a chocolate cake for dessert. Sofia told us that she couldn’t eat it because her mother (Nina) said to her that chocolate and “refined sugars” will give her pimples. Emily reassured her that it was nothing to worry about, and Nina immediately interjected and said “Oh she does! Cause look at you (Emily).”

I was stunned. However, Emily gave me a look that told me to drop it.

So I did. I hoped that was the only backhanded comment of the afternoon.

Nina spent the entire lunch talking about Sofia. She kept saying that Sofia was destined to be a star from birth, or that Nina was the “better grandchild.” The entire afternoon was uncomfortable, with Nina bragging about Sofia’s accomplishment, and Sofia and I awkwardly following along.

Emily mentioned how our daughter is beginning to sit up. Nina cuts in saying how our daughter could easily book a role, but her downside is that she’s “just an ugly baby.” When we looked at her shocked, she complained that “HER daughter looked much better at that age and was already primed to be a star.

Unfortunately, he aimed his rude remark at his 10yo niece instead of at his sister.

Maybe I was extremely sleep deprived, but I yelled at Nina that “I couldn’t care less about Sofia and I want to enjoy my meal in peace.”

Nina was offended and left in a hurry, after cursing my wife and my child out. Emily says that I probably shouldn’t have said that in front of Sofia.

And I think Reddit is about to read him his rights.

The top comment says that even if his sister is awful (she is) that doesn’t make his behavior ok.

This person says the mom/sister obviously has so many issues of her own.

They really hope OP will try to set things right with his poor niece.

The moms of 10yo girls have spoken, and it’s not good.

Many of the commenters think his niece really needs good adults in her life. At least one.

The kids are definitely the ones missing out here.

I do hope that poor girl is going to be ok.