If you think about it, the majority of relationships in your life will not stand the test of time. Most people will be there for awhile, hopefully teach you something about the world or yourself, until you both realize that it’s time to move on.
And when someone shows you a rotten core? It’s time to move on.
OP has started introducing her kids to her boyfriend’s family.
I honestly can’t tell if I’m over reacting or not but here goes. I have two kids (girl – 7, boy – 9) and recently I’ve started introducing them to my boyfriend’s parents.
Now, boyfriend’s dad has no filter. There is nothing he will not say. They were over at our house yesterday and we were sitting at the kitchen table with my daughter before we left to go to a restaurant for dinner.
He was saying the most vile things. Terrible jokes. Every swear word you can imagine, the N word, all of it.
Boyfriend is laughing, swearing, going along with it. I end up taking my daughter out of the room and keeping her busy until we go out to eat.
When they went to dinner one night, though, his father’s behavior was inexcusable.
We get to the restaurant. He openly mocks my 9 year old son, tells him he’s a girl because he has long hair, and because he’s a girl does he wear a training bra.
Makes jokes about my daughter playing hockey and how girls can’t play sports.
Everyone is laughing except me, my son, and daughter. I’m desperately making comments to try and diffuse.
At one point he asks me to describe how tight the rear was of a woman who I had been referencing in a story… on and on with this stuff.
OP felt awful for not saying and doing more in the moment.
I get home and I can’t sleep all night. I’m so mad at myself for not calling it out, for not saying something while it was happening.
I texted my Bf, I said going forward I’m gonna keep the kids out of his families stuff, it’s not my style, I don’t want the kids around it… whatever.
Her boyfriend thinks she’s overreacting.
A huge fight follows, he says it’s just the way he is, that he has good intentions, he doesn’t mean anything by it.
He says it’s my responsibility to teach the kids that different people exist, that they need to learn that that’s how some people are and that’s the way it is.
I say no, it’s my job to protect my kids now, to show my daughter that she doesn’t need to tolerate “old creepy men” that say offensive things just to avoid making people uncomfortable.
That my son shouldn’t have to put up with a grown man marking jokes at his expense and have adults laugh at him when he can’t defend himself.
I ask him why he isn’t as mad as I am that his dad is saying that stuff so freely around kids.
Why isn’t he angry that his dad is making horrible s–ual comments to his son’s girlfriend. I say that any adult that says such vile things so freely around small children is a piece of s—.
I know that it’s hard for my boyfriend to feel like I’m attacking his dad, but it makes me so angry and I really think he is a disgusting man.
I’m very open to advice and opinions. We are on the verge of breaking up over this!
Does Reddit? I’m betting not.
The top comment says OP is awful for not dumping him immediately.
This person says the dad is not the only issue.
They say their kids need a strong mom right now.
Everyone is very concerned about the kiddos.
My heart hurts just reading this.
I am glad it seems that she’s taken the advice and moved on.
If you liked that story, check out this post about a group of employees who got together and why working from home was a good financial decision.
Source: https://twistedsifter.com/2024/02/her-boyfriends-dad-insulted-her-kids-in-public-so-shes-refusing-to-spend-time-with-them-going-forward/