27 Moments That Ended Marriages

25.

“Looking back, there were a series of moments over a period of two to three years, but there were two that finally sealed the deal. After years of marital counseling telling me I was the problem, and I started individual therapy, and my ex suddenly deciding that she was going to change careers, so I went from providing about 70% of the income and 60-70% of the housework/childcare to 80-90% of the income and 95% of the housework/childcare. After doing that for about six months, I essentially had a breakdown and was told by my employer to take some time off. Started having slight suicidal ideations, and told her (via text, one night when she announced she probably was going to come home late because she ‘needed a break’). Her response was ‘Jesus! You should talk to someone!’ (literally, over text).”

“After that, I entered some intensive outpatient counseling, and a few weeks into it, we had a family session. She started crying about 30 seconds in and made the entire session about how I mistreated her and wasn’t giving her enough support because my taking a break from work and talking about killing myself was causing her stress. … During the next individual counseling session, my therapist clearly went to great pains to not come right out and tell me the marriage was over, but eventually said something like ‘if you want this marriage to survive, and it’s your choice whether you do or not, you may have to get used to the fact that your wife cannot be a source of emotional support for you. If you’re okay with that, then sure, with a lot of work, you can probably make this work…’ That was like a light bulb going off in my head, and I brought up separating about two weeks later.”

—u/Alternative_Cash6088