26 People Shared What Burnout Feels Like To Them

20.

“I had to walk over a canal every day to and from the subway station, and every day I’d think about jumping off that bridge. I was 100% certain that I didn’t REALLY want to do it, but I couldn’t stop thinking about it, and that in and of itself is exhausting.”

“I ‘bathed’ everyday with pre-moistened body wipes because I couldn’t muster the energy to shower, and thus managed to maintain a facade for a long time. (Friends have since confirmed that I didn’t stink, at worst it was like I’d gone to the gym for a light workout earlier that day.)

And I got to the point where I started using paper plates and bowls because I had no energy to wash dishes, and the only chores I could manage were basic cat care (feeding, water bowl filling, changing litter) and taking out the trash. Just the absolute necessities for my pets’ health (not mine), and preventing vermin and odors so I didn’t lose my apartment.

I did try to get support and better conditions from my employers, but their attitude was mostly lip service with a touch of ‘if you don’t like it, you can leave.’ But because I could not afford to not have an income, and I knew I did not have the energy to look for a new job, I kept plugging away until they eventually fired me with unemployment benefits.

Only then could I finally muster the energy to seek help, but by then, my severe burnout had morphed into a very deep depression. So the moral of the story is, whatever it takes, try try try to seek help sooner than I did.“

—etconner