10.
“Treating ‘No.’ Like the complete sentence it is. I still fall into over-explaining when triggered sometimes, but nowhere near like I used to. It wasn’t important what I was saying, my abusers simply valued the output and energy wasted. It kept me exhaustedly compliant for years. Never. Again.”
“I had to work on letting the silence fill the space instead of my words. It was really uncomfortable, but once I started doing this in person, I did so online, too. That includes when people try to accuse me of lying about health issues and stuff like that. I simply block them. I don’t owe some rando, on the internet, or real life, an explanation of why I exist and how I manage to do it.
It’s also why I will ignore/confront passive-aggressive remarks because I’m not doing another adult’s emotional regulating for them. I did that a lot for my parents.
Now, instead of being triggered to over-explain to these people, I see them as a sort of energy vampire, and I’m nobody’s fucking meal. I have better things to do than explain myself to some dude who tried and failed to tell me to smile, or some woman who tries to imply my hair color isn’t ‘something she would do.’ I’m glad I’m not either of these people frankly.”
—u/Hour-Requirement6489
Source: https://www.buzzfeed.com/ravenishak/things-that-improve-quality-of-life