Last week it was reported that some cocaine had been found in the White House. Also Donald Trump is awaiting trial for allegedly mishandling classified government documents. Could the two stories be related? To most, almost certainly not. But to a galaxy brain like Donald Trump, who wants his old job back so very badly, they very well could be.

As per Raw Story, the former president took to Truth Social — which is fading into extra-irrelevancy since Threads arrived to kill Twitter — to do what he does best: fire off wackadoodle thoughts about the big issues of the day.

Trump began by returning to his baseless claim that the blow belonged to Hunter Biden but also his father Joe. He claimed the snow dump was definitely caught by security cameras, and that if tapes aren’t made public then they were clearly “destroyed.”

But he was far from done. “Was Crooked Joe Biden on Cocaine when he instructed the FBI/DOJ to illegally invade my home, Mar-a-Lago, in complete and total violation of my 4th Amendment Rights?” Trump wrote in a second post, veering way off path. “Was he on Cocaine, or various other substances, when he, for the first time in U.S. history, had his political opponent, who is leading him in the Polls by a lot, indicted and arrested (twice, if you include the DOJ run Manhattan D.A.’s Office)?”

Trump concluded with his usual inspiring superhero catchphrase, “WE ARE A NATION IN DECLINE!!!”

These words aren’t worth digging into much, but it should be noted that Biden has never exactly exuded cokehead vibes. Besides, the right’s frequent attempts to paint him as some nefarious ne’er-do-well — who’s also, they say, too old and too enfeebled to be president again — are reliably bizarre. But this may be the strangest accusation Biden’s received yet.

Not everyone in the GOP is cool with the theory that the nose candy belonged to Hunter Biden (or Joe). Even a Fox News anchor said it was wrong to make jokes about someone who has openly struggled with addiction, while Kayleigh McEnany, who’s spent her fair share of time in at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, argued it was highly unlikely it would have belonged to him. But then she and Trump aren’t on great terms right now.

(Via Raw Story)