‘She actually rubs it in my, Lily, and Michelle’s faces.’ Their Parents Play Favorites. Is The Eldest Sibling Supposed To Pretend It Doesn’t Matter?

In reality, most parents probably have a child that they feel more connected to or that they have more in common with, especially once they start to come into their own.

That said, I think it’s dead wrong for the kiddos to know exactly who that is and why, especially when they’re still young and impressionable.

OP has three younger sisters (two of them much younger) and they’re all aware that the second of the four of them is their parents’ favorite.

(22F) I have three younger sisters: (20F) Ariel, (14F) Lily, and (12F) Michelle. My parents have always been very open about favoring Ariel over the rest of us. Likely because Ariel has a more social and extroverted personality type, like our parents, whereas me, Lily, and Michelle are more quiet and usually stick to a small group of friends.

Ariel also was the only sibling who shared certain hobbies with our dad. So he especially (but still both of our parents) would show favoritism to Ariel through things such as being involved in her hobbies, having an active interest in her social life, praising her accomplishments, and getting her nicer presents whereas I did not receive that treatment and Lily and Michelle currently do not either.

The favorite sister also knows she is the favorite, and enjoys rubbing it in her siblings’ faces whenever she gets the chance.

I know that our parents are the ones choosing to openly favor Ariel and their favoritism isn’t her fault directly. But Ariel recognizes the favoritism to the point of being able to verbally acknowledge it yet is okay with it since she’s the favorite.

She actually rubs it in my, Lily, and Michelle’s faces.

Just a few weeks ago, Ariel told Lily and Michelle that it was their faults that our dad ignores them by saying something along the lines of “He’d be interested in you as well if you were good at XYZ. If you want that, then you should try getting into XYZ.”

I only talk to our parents to stay close to Lily and Michelle. I don’t make any effort to be involved with Ariel at all.

OP realized that after her two youngest sisters made the honor roll no one really cared, so she treated them to a night out, just the three of them.

This school year, both Lily and Michelle made the honor roll at their school. Since our mom didn’t acknowledge it beyond an “Oh, good job” and our dad didn’t acknowledge it at all, I took Lily and Michelle to Dave and Buster’s and some of their other favorite spots to celebrate.

I admit we stayed out pretty late. My parents were spending the night somewhere else, so only Ariel was home by the time we got back.

After Lily and Michelle went to bed, I was preparing to leave when Ariel asked to talk.

The “favorite” sister confronted her about being left out, and about some other times recently the oldest sister wasn’t there for her.

Ariel brought up that I hadn’t come to her graduation. I told Ariel that she never came to any of my graduations, plus she didn’t even ask me to be at hers.

Ariel told me her birthday last month was bad enough because a lot less people came than she expected and I didn’t get her a present when I clearly had the money to take Lily and Michelle out.

Ariel accused me of not liking her or caring about what’s going on in her life.

OP told her she didn’t really care that much, and gave her reasons as her behavior toward her and their younger sisters.

I told Ariel in as objective a way as possible that her accusation was true for the reasons explained in the second paragraph.

She said herself, we aren’t “worthy” of being our parents’ favorite like she is, so just leave us be.

Ariel cried but I was too tired to deal with her and just went home.

Some of her friends think she’s punishing the wrong person, but others think the sister is just reaping what she’s sewn.

I talked to some friends about the situation, and a few told me that they feel bad for Ariel. They said she is also a victim of our parents’ favoritism and now she has to watch her sisters be super close to one another while she’s the odd one out.

AITA For still arguing with my friends that Ariel is now 20 and is no victim now that she’s an adult?

Where does Reddit fall? Let’s find out!

The top comment says her sister needs to realize there are consequences for her actions.

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And this person says the spoiled sister is old enough to learn that lesson, for sure.

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They say she’s likely just sad that she’s the one who has caused the distance between herself and her sisters.

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This commenter votes NTA too, and hopes OP will continue to be there for her younger sisters.

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This person agrees that the spoiled sister is old enough to know better, and has no empathy.

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Sometimes people just need a wake up call as far as how their actions affect others.

In a perfect world, this would be hers.