‘it was very awkward.’ Was She Being A Judgy Jerk For Worrying A Wedding Guest Might Steal Her Favorite Tray?

We might want to – or even strive to – think the best of others, but the truth is, people will let you down at least some of the time. It’s just nature.

OP has a tea tray that she loves and considers expensive, so when she and her boyfriend made cookies to contribute to a friend’s “cookie table” at their 300 person wedding, she said she didn’t want to use it.

With so many people – all of whom were virtual strangers to her – there was no telling what could happen to it.

My boyfriend (30M) and I (30F) were invited to his friend’s wedding. I’ve met the bride and groom a few times, he has known them for decades.

There is a local tradition for each guest to bring a dozen cookies to the wedding, then at the wedding everybody’s cookies are displayed together to make a cookie table. We wanted to participate, so we baked cookies the night before.

I have a very beautiful and expensive tea tray. Boyfriend suggested that I use it to display the cookies. I said no, it’s a 300-person wedding, I don’t want some auntie “accidentally” taking it home with her.

Her boyfriend didn’t make a big deal about it and they used a pretty bowl instead, but at the wedding, he “joked” with the bride and groom that she thought one of their guests would steal the tray.

Boyfriend seemed fine with this, we found a simple bowl that was perfectly appropriate for the occasion, and used that to display the cookies.

After the wedding as we were preparing to leave and I went to retrieve my bowl, boyfriend told the newlyweds that I didn’t want to use my tea tray because I thought one of their guests might steal it.

The moment was super awkward and OP wants to know whether or not she was wrong to be upset with her boyfriend for calling her out like that.

I tried to backtrack by saying that I just didn’t want it to get misplaced or damaged, but he “called me out on lying.”

The newlyweds said something about everyone there being friends and family, it was very awkward and we left shortly.

I am angry because I told him that in confidence and he should have known better than to repeat that to his friends, even though they were very close.

Reddit has thoughts!

The top comment says her boyfriend needs lessons on how to act in public.

Image Credit: Reddit

This person says give him one chance to change the behavior, but only one.

Image Credit: Reddit

And this comment says OP is correct in not wanting to bring the tray in the first place.

Image Credit: Reddit

They don’t think her assessment of human nature was far off, either.

Image Credit: Reddit

This commenter doesn’t think he should get a single pass.

Image Credit: Reddit

This is a perfect example of a “small” argument that’s actually big.

I think these incidents are going to, more and more, be what makes women just walk away.