Pop a bottle of red or white and read through this list of hilarious wine puns. There’s nothing better than laughing out loud as you get your wine buzz on.
1. What’s it called when you get a really bad wine hangover?
The grape depression.
2. How do you perform wine first-aid?
Open the bottle. If it doesn’t look like it’s breathing, give it mouth-to-mouth.
3. Why was the raisin sad?
She never got to achieve true grapeness by becoming wine.
4. I’m not a wino.
I’m a wine-yes.
5. What did the grape say when it was crushed?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
6. He said his non-alcoholic wine was delicious.
I told him he had zero proof.
7. How do you make a wine drinking happy?
Give them a Riesling to be cheerful.
8. Why did the woman complain about the service at the restaurant?
Whoever served the wine did a pour job.
9. How did Betty get so drunk at the party?
She kept saying “wine not.”
10. How do you spot an amateur wine taster?
There’s usually a blanc look on their face.
11. How does a wine drinker hear about the next best brand?
Through the grapevine.
12. How does a wine connoisseur decide what to drink?
On a case by case basis.