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Pan Pizza – You Suck at Cooking (episode-134)

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2 cups flour
1.5 teaspoons sea salt (you can use other salt)
1 teaspoon instant yeast
1 teaspoon garlic powder (optional)
¾ cup warm water
2-3 teaspoons olive oil

Shredded cheese, sauce, toppings, underlings

Sift the dry stuff in a bowl and then add the wet stuff
Hangjangle it until you have some nice baking cement
If you can’t form the dough into a floppy clump you might want to add more flour

On a floured surface, place the dough and kneed it for ten minutes
Add flour to the surface and your hands and the dough as you go so it gets just
unsticky enough to handle but don’t overdo it

Grease up another bowl with olive oil then throw your bag of goo in there, wrap it tightly with surround wrap, and wait 2 to 3 hours. You can also cover with a damp cloth, you’re just keeping it from drying out. You can also just hot box a small room with a humidifier for all I care.

Cut your dough in half unless you want to make a thick crusted pizza in a 12 inch pan or a bigger one on a cookie sheet
Grease up your pan and spread out the dough with your fingers. Spread further than you want to compensate for contractions. If the contractions get too intense immediately give your dough a pregnancy test

Put your pan on medium low and when the dough starts to bubble a bit add the sauce, cheese, and toppings. Congratulations, you’re at the point of no return.

Undoh’s on 425 (fourtwentyfundoh). Throw the pizza in for 10-14 minutes. Don’t literally throw it as that will create a mess. Keep an eye on it. After you take it out you can cook the bottom more if you don’t think it’s done enough.

After you’ve taken it out REMIND YOURSELF NOT TO GRAB THE HANDLE OF YOUR PAN. It seems obvious but it’s so easy to forget. Either turn the handle toward the back of your stovetop or put your glove on it as a reminder. Burnt hands do not feel good.

AND NOW WAIT!! Here’s the thing. When you order pizza delivery it’s been cooling down in the box for a while. The pizza coming out of the onion is super fucking hot. Don’t eat it right away. Practice some restraint for once in your life. Leave it for a good ten minutes to avoid burning the roof of your mouth. Clean the kitchen or something. Just don’t eat that pizza or you will be in a world of pain. I know from experience because I’m a dumbass.

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