There’s something undeniably magical about toys when you’re a kid, especially the weirdly niche and gimmicky ones – and boy are there tons of those.
Mystery bag toys that dissolve in water so you don’t know what you get, offensive trading cards like Garbage Pail Kids, the Easy Bake Oven for boys, “Creepy Crawlers”… I mean shelves were filled with so many off-the-wall concepts and playful ideas that any kid walking through a toy store was bound to find the specific toy that spoke to them, no matter how weird.
I mean just look at the “Trash Bag Bunch” and tell me this product could’ve been un-ironically conceived and actually sold in any other time period except the early ’90s.
For some reason, intentionally ugly and gross toys became a big thing to market to young boys when I was growing up. There was even a major video game release about a janitor-turned-superhero called “Boogerman,” who would literally flick boogers and fart.
The game wasn’t great, but it was super duper gross in all the ways that kids love. I remember playing it at a party with my younger brother’s friends and they cackled in delight with every nose flick and fart noise. Whoever developed that terrible game knew what they were doing.
The thing is though, when you’re creating something intentionally gross, it’s probably best to let your intended audience know that this is an on-purpose ugly and weird product, without leaving any room for speculation.
This kind of confusion led to some hilarious results when a Tumblr user shared photos of a “Grow Baby” toy they found and decided to put in water, following the product’s instructions.
The 15-hour-long process started delivering results around the 9-hour mark.
But the birthing process ended up taking a lot longer than 15 hours. The egg finally opened up at the 23-hour mark, and the person who bought it did not like what they saw inside.
Does this look like a normal baby head to you?
What emerged from the toy egg wasn’t a cute and cuddly baby — but rather an infant version of the leprosy dad from Braveheart.
I mean look at this dude and tell me this baby isn’t a dead ringer.
Some people shared their other “baby surprises”.
While some noticed that the baby looked very similar to certain public figures.
Lots of Twitter users wanted to unsee the disaster that emerged from the egg.
As it turns out though, lots of toys that grow in water for some reason wind up looking busted.
And if you’re still trying to figure out exactly what this baby looks like, “deep fried Buddha Statue” pretty much hits it on the head.
Please, toy manufacturers, if you’re going to make a toy really gross, just market it as such to your target demographic. Thanks.