These People Actually Tried Those "Make $10k A Month" Schemes And Revealed What Happened

It’s probably happened to you. You’ve desperately been looking for a job and applied to countless places. You want something that’s a bit respectable, so retail is out of the question. You’re sick and tired of reeking of fried oil and having throbbing feet, so the food service industry is out as well.

If only you could have an office job. Somewhere you could climb the corporate ladder. Use some of the skills you developed in college before you graduated or decided to take off for a couple of years to “figure things out.”

But mostly, you just want money. And a decent amount of it. The kind of money where you wouldn’t have to ride the bus. Or if you have a car, the kind where a $700 repair bill wouldn’t destroy you. The kind of job where you don’t have to feel bad spending a few bucks every day for a quick snack or drink. Where you don’t have to mooch off of your friend’s Amazon Prime membership. Wouldn’t that be nice?

You obsess over the “gets” of status more than what you need to do to obtain that status in the first place. So you want that shortcut, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow before busting your hump to get that rainbow to appear in the first place. You’re so desperate that when someone gets back to you saying they have a marketing job that’ll help you earn thousands of dollars a month with no set schedule, you’re all ears.

You go to a conference room. There’s a guy in an ill-fitting suit promising you the world, explaining different marketing schemes and tactics and “levels” of earners. Only thing is you need to spend a bit of cash to get in. Then you realize you’ve been suckered into wasting your time: this “job opportunity” is an elaborate scam. And the complimentary energy drink at the door they asked if you liked? Yeah, they’re gonna try to sell you a case of it before you leave.

This recent Reddit AMA post is filled with poor unfortunate souls who weren’t quick enough to spot the phoniness of said marketing schemes. They shared their stories of what happened when they actually responded to one of these scams.

Sometimes, your own “friends” try to sucker you in.

Guy who lived in my campus at University learned that i was looking for a job and being an international student there are visa restrictions on how long i can work for in a week during term time.

Showed me pictures of all cool meetings he has been going to, suited up at posh hotels. For part time it was unreal. I decided to give it a shot and meet his supervisors at a restaurant (not an office) so they can tell me more about the job.

Reach there to find there is an entire gang drooling to sign me up under them. Show me pamphlets and tell me the company has been endorsed by Donald Trump ( before he became president).

Then after telling me all about their products and the parties and the money they make, they tell me to join their company I’ll have to pay about £400 and that was it.

I needed a job to earn money not spend money to get a job. Realised it’s a pyramid scheme bullshit and bounced. Blocked the entire gang i met but still get requests now and then.


Some of the “scams” were actually pretty brilliant, like this one guy who basically told people they were stupid to their faces.

Years ago I was browsing the internet and there was this ad saying that you could make 20k a month from home only doing as little as 4hrs of work a day. These ads were pretty common and I knew they were a scam, but one day I had too much free time on my hands, found one that had a site attached to it with the owner of the whole thing showing off in videos the money that came into his bank account and it had a low fee tied to it, like 10 or 15 bucks.

The ‘offer’ consisted of a ‘self-published self-help book’. You know the kind, it’s a tier lower than self help books and a tier lower than self published it’s the kind that is a pdf on some sketchy pdf selling site.

Again, I knew it was fake, a scam, but the curiosity got the better of me. I didn’t want to know the secret of getting rich (because I knew it was bs), I wanted to know what the scam was, what that money would buy me. See what was so ridiculously sly that he actually made huge chunks of money out of it (because I was fairly sure that the transactions that he showed in the vids were genuine).

So I bought the ‘book’ (i.e. pdf) and after downloading I opened it with anticipation. I don’t remember the exact contents but basically it was one page, on that page were about 4 lines and the gist of it was ‘Make a pdf in which you instruct people to make a pdf, to then sell it for $10 as a book that will teach you how to make 20k a month without working for it’.

I thought it was so cheeky, plus there was no return policy from the store or the payment method that I used, that I figured he deserved it if he was able to play me that good.

I remember sitting at my desk and laughing and thinking ‘that motherfucker’ for at least half an hour.


Amway? More like SCAMWAY!

My dad and grandpa were in the used car business together. They did well and would do some investments from time to time and were doing well.

They had a customer (like, a “regular,” had bought a couple cars, referred people, someone they knew better than a guy off the street) (we’ll call him George) invite them to an amazing investment opportunity, and so my dad and grandpa went.

It was like a presentation, and there were maybe 2-3 dozen or so people there. Almost immediately upon arriving, my dad’s Amway senses were tingling and he tried to tell my grandpa, who shook it off, “George wouldn’t be into that stuff, let’s just hear this out.”

Like 2 minutes into the presentation, my dad knows for sure it’s Amway (or similar) and tries to tell my grandpa again (they’re on the 2nd row with George). Again, my grandpa dismisses him.

Finally, it’s revealed that it’s 100% some MLM (I honestly can’t remember if it was Amway or not) and my grandpa immediately jumps up in the middle of the presentation and angerly yells at George, “How could you? You brought us to some Amway crap!” and storms out of there.


This person who should’ve stopped the second he heard the Indian accent.

I did this about 5 years ago. So stupid. It was some kind of stock website where you call if a stock is going up or down and bet on it. I signed up just to see what it was like. Then all of a sudden a guy calls my house from the company and kinda explains it to me in his Indian accent. Convinced me to put in $200 to try it then tried to get another $1000 out of me. When you try and get your money back it doesn’t let you. I guess they need all this government ID uploaded and all your information. I hung up the phone on him and realized I was out $200. Now they must have sold my information because other scammers keep calling me and they know my name. 


Amway suckers another person into dinner.

This was in the pre-internet times, a co-worker says ‘hey, you want to know how to make more money? Come to dinner with my family tonight. ‘ After a nice meal, we head off to the living room and he starts to play a VHS tape that goes on and on about ‘don’t you want a boat, a big house, etc.’ After that I’m psyched. Yeah, it was Amway. So I said, okay if this is so good, why don’t you open a store in the mall? Or you pay for shelf space in an existing store? No, it doesn’t work that way I’m told. So I passed.


Real-estate is usually a rock solid investment – just not this way.

My brother fell for this real-estate investment scam in Detroit after attending a free siminar. The idea was that you don’t invest your own money – other people hire you to manage their money and invest it in houses around Detroit, and you get paid commission somehow.

I explained in detail how the scam worked and even showed him comments online. He and his friend still spent $1000 to attend the next, ‘exclusive’ seminar where they would share all of their trade secrets, and luckily it was during that meeting that he realized it was a scam.

He was out $1000, but hey, I guess it could have been worse. Apparently there were still a lot of people who continued to allow themselves to be scammed beyond that though.


Dungeons and Dragons and energy drinks.

This guy i used to play dungeons and dragons with fell for one of those. He was working a shitty factory job but was doing well enough to support him and his wife. Out of the blue he starts talking about this really cool organic energy drink and is trying to get me to buy into. Starts organizing “workout” sessions to promote it. Dropped his job pretty much immediately. He even posted on Facebook once saying “What’s everyone doing today?” and him being someone I’ve drank with commented “knocking back a few tonight, wanna hang?”. He promptly deleted my comment and messaged me saying not to comment on his things saying that because it would hurt his business reputation.

After that we kind of quit talking, but i saw his wife a few months later and i asked how she was. She said she wasn’t doing so well lately because she was the only one bringing in money. Her parents were helping them a lot. His “business” was going no where.

Now they’re divorced and i haven’t heard from him in forever but I’m still friends with his wife on Facebook. She’s doing well. It was just really sad to watch their relationship deteriorate.


What is it with these energy supplement scams?

My dad was meant to be one of the founders of one of these companies. His friend from 20 years back called his one day out of the blue telling him about a great business opportunity. After months of building websites, pouring money, and time into the company, his friend embezzled the money and bought an island with it. He then started another company with the same product, but with a different name. My dad has never been the same since and has a hate/distrust towards everyone now… 


Sorry kids, if you want to make money, it’s best to not listen to someone with “secret advice” on how to become a multi-millionaire. If their plan works so well, they’d be doing it themselves.

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This Woman Came Up With The Best Use Of A Label Maker On Her Damaged Shoe

While traversing the wonderful world of Costco with my wife, we happened upon a label maker. Because it was aggressively priced and looked pretty awesome, and my wife is devoted to all things related to organization and cleanliness, she wanted to buy it. So we did.

For nearly three years it sat in its packaging. “One day we’ll get around to using the label maker,” she said. But as time passed on, it was never cracked open. Until it was, and let me tell you, that thing is pretty awesome.

There’s something to be said about a concise, professional, small, glossy strip of difficult-to-remove paper that screams “I’ve got it together”. Now that might sound silly, but I have to admit, even though we didn’t use the darn thing for a long time, the second I saw those angular, crisp labels around the house, I didn’t have a smidgen of buyer’s remorse. Not a smidgen.

As much as I enjoy my wife’s use of the label maker, it’s all a bit mundane and she hasn’t gotten as creative with it as she can.

Unlike this woman walking around NYC with a damaged shoe.

At first glance, it doesn’t seem like much: a sticker on top of a flat that looks a bit roughed up.

But a closer look revealed that the label offered a brief explanation for why her shoe looks the way it does.

“My dog chewed it.”

That’s right, people. She used a label maker to turn a perfectly good, if not slightly damaged, pair of flats into a secret easter egg of comedy. If you’ve ever commuted through the streets of NYC, you’ll understand that it’s the little things like this that brighten your day.

Turns out I wasn’t alone in my admiration of this woman’s inventive use of a label maker.

And several people related to the messed-up-shoe struggle that this woman is clearly suffering from. So much so that they began sharing photos of their own ruined kicks.

I don’t know why dogs love chewing on shoes, but they just do.

Maybe it’s because they’re on the floor and easy to grab?

Or could it be that our footwear picks up all of the scents and life from the outdoors, and our animal friends with their keen senses of smell go on a miniature adventure every time they bite one of our sneakers or stiletto heels?

As it turns out though, this label-making genius was in good company when it comes to explaining why certain clothing items were ruined. This person detailed the stories behind the stains on this one shirt.

It’s not just dogs who are guilty of chewing, either. Wascally wabbits are known to nibble on everything in sight.

But lets get real, dogs are probably the biggest culprits. It’s hard to be mad at a face like that, though.

We all have our own clothing imperfections to deal with at the end of the day. Whether its stains, wear and tear, or food memorials.

What would your explanatory labels most likely say?

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People Are Trolling Their Moms By 'Moving Out'

Moms sacrifice so much for us. They literally carry us around for nine months, and then proceed to carry us through life for another 18 to 30 or so years. Seriously, I still don’t fully understand how the washing machine works at age 26 and I appreciate your patience, mom. But that doesn’t land them a ‘get out of jail free card’ when it comes to trolling. 

It all started when Twitter user Maurice Nelson posted this screenshot of them trolling their own mother with this rather creative joke. “Got my own house at 17,” a caption alongside the tweet, which has received over 88,000 retweets and 300,000 likes, reads: 

Unsurprisingly, the joke was well-received by other Twitter users. So much so, that people are attempting the same joke with their own mothers, and let’s just say that responses have been mixed… 

Hector’s sister wasn’t very happy either. 

Some responses are just too sweet for this world. 

While other moms simple aren’t amused. 

I don’t think she’s buying it. 

Ouch, mom. Ouch. 

This dad wasn’t having it either. 


This mom must have a Twitter account. 

‘Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.” 

“What I do?”

The nerve. 

What was her response, though? 

She has a headache. 

Bless these moms. 

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This Woman's Bathroom Selfie Has Everyone Concerned About Her Bathroom Design

You know how when you’re feeling yourself and you decide to take a pic in the mirror of your outfit/hair/makeup or whatever for posterity? And then you post it online to get those likes? But then instead of getting comments about how cute you are you get a million questions about how you use the bathroom? Yeah, happens all the time.

So, this is Paula Espino, she has a fairly large social media following and you can see why (she’s gorgeous):

Espino posted yet another cute selfie last Thursday, thinking it’d be pretty much like any other, but things very quickly unraveled.

Can you tell what’s wrong with this picture?


One of the first things people noticed was what appears to be a toilet paper roll miles form the actual toilet and so high up on the wall you practically need a stepladder to wipe your butt:

But there’s also another one…behind the toilet?

After that, everyone had a critique. What’s up with the outlet?

Having an outlet as close to the can as possible actually makes a lot of sense to me.

But the toilet roll cannot possibly work:

Espino was interviewed by Buzzfeed, and actually the bathroom is in her aunt’s house in Mexico. She tried to get answers to everyone’s questions:

“My aunt said that she doesn’t even use the rack under the toilet at all.”

“She’s always on her phone for hours since she can charge it while she’s doing her business.”

“For other utilities like the hair dryer and stuff, she does find it annoying that she can’t be near the mirror.”

And according to Espino, the toilet paper is near the toilet, presumably on yet another toilet roll holder that’s not pictured.

She also claims to have never thought about how weird it all is, saying, “To be honest I never noticed all these odd things until people pointed them out.”


Though it’s all been explained, people are still enjoying the mythical qualities of the bathroom. And maybe considering adding an outlet to their own privy chamber:

It makes sense!

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This Toddler's Imaginary 'Friend' Sounds An Awful Lot Like A Ghost

When I was a kid, I had a few imaginary friends.

There was some dude named Michael who I think was just a representation of how I thought I’d be like when I grew up. I mean I always loved the name Michael (Mustafa wasn’t really all that cool where I was from), so that made sense. There was also this trio of cartoon cats that would come out and play every once in a while, I have Paula Abdul to thank for that, as well as a talking bird I could tell my secrets to.

My mom would be supportive of my imaginary friends, but eventually when I started going to school they began visiting me less and less until they ultimately faded away.

I didn’t really think about imaginary friends that much until I watched A Beautiful Mind and thought about how terrifying it would be going about your daily life when there are individuals you can hold conversations with, individuals that never age and you care about, and you’re the only one who can see them.

In fact, the entire concept of imaginary friends is pretty darn scary when you think about it, and it’s made even more scary when a kid tells you about an imaginary friend that doesn’t seem “friendly” at all. Like this 3-year-old girl who’s got a pal named “Grateful.”

 A magazine asked some toddlers to illustrate and talk about their imaginary friends and while I’m sure some of them are absolutely adorable, there were some that are absolutely terrifying. Just read the description for this metaphysical comrade of Ruby’s and tell me this isn’t something straight out of a new-age horror flick:

This is my imaginary mum, Grateful. Her yellow eyelashes mean she can see in the dark – she only comes to see me at night-time. It scares me sometimes, but I always want her to come back. She has two babies in her belly. She’s 14, but can never have a birthday.

Once word of Ruby’s imaginary friend broke out online, people pointed out the obvious.

And it’s that she wasn’t talking about an imaginary friend at all, but a g-g-g-GHOST!

Now kids have been known to say some pretty creepy things that have freaked their parents out. I remember my younger brother and sister, when sleeping in bed with my mother when they were toddlers, complaining about the “fire babies” that circled above their heads, keeping them up at night.

Parents on Reddit shared some of the more bone-chilling things their kids have told them. WARNING: don’t read these before going to bed.

I was tucking in my two year old. He said “Good bye dad.” I said, “No, we say good night.” He said “I know. But this time its good bye.”

Had to check on him a few times to make sure he was still there.


This snake-neck man story is pretty scary, as well.

While changing my daughter in front of the open closet door. She kept looking around me and laughing. I asked her what was so funny. She said, “the man.” To which I replied, “what man?” She then pointed at the closet and said, “the man with the snake neck.” I turn around and nothing was there. I’m afraid to look into the history of my house to see if anyone hung themselves in the closet. At least she wasn’t scared.


Some were just plain messed up:

Not to me, but to his grandmother.

He was cuddling with her and being very sweet (he was about 3 at the time). He takes her face in his hands, and brings his face close to hers, then tells her that she’s very old, and will die soon.

Then he makes a point of looking at the clock.


This “Bad Man” one would have me moving out immediately.

Why are you crying?

“Bad man”

What bad man?

“There.” Points behind me at a dark corner of the room

Lamp on bookshelf next to said darkened corner falls off as soon as I turn to look.

She slept in our bed that night


Some of these shouldn’t be allowed to watch Black Mirror:

My five year old son asked me last week “what do you see through the black circles in my eyes when you’re controlling me when I’m at school?” 


Others maybe shouldn’t hold a lighter. Like, ever.

“So I shouldn’t throw him in the fire?”

3 year old daughter holding her baby brother for the first time.


Out of all of them, this one creeped me out the most though:

My co-worker’s four year old daughter always thought that the rattling of the water pipes in the kitchen cupboards were “white wolves” and the sound always scared her.

One day she was sitting at the kitchen table and she said, “Mom. The white wolves aren’t bad… they’re our friends!”

Her mom encouraged the idea by saying, “Yes! The white wolves are protecting us. They are our friends.”

Then her daughter added in, “They’re our friends, but not the man who crawls on the floor and stands by my bed”.

Yeah, no thanks. (h/t fox 5)

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This Guy Found A Cat And Her Kittens Under His Bed And His Whole Life Changed

Cat lovers know what gifts from above their furry jerks are. It’s hard to be too sad when you have an animal rubbing its head on your ankles and then biting them. My cat always cheers me up, or at the very least, makes me get out of bed to feed them—and once you’re out of bed, you might as well continue on with the day!

Twitter user Paris Zarcilla was having a rough day when he suddenly received an incredibly generous gift from the universe. He’d been intending to go out, and went to his room to find a sweater. Instead he found a reason to celebrate forever.

Underneath his bed was a cat he’d never met before, and she’d just given birth to the most adorable kittens Zarcilla had ever seen in his life:

Can you imagine? What a miracle. 

Zarcilla was completely blown away by this unexpected turn of events:

He obviously had to turn his life around immediately:

Thankfully, Zarcilla live-tweeted the transcendent experience, and we all got to see these magnificent creatures:

The transformation into a certified Cat Dad was basically instantaneous. Zarcilla gave up all his usual worldly pleasures for the benefit of his new cat babies:

It was almost too much:

But actually, it was just enough. Zarcilla shared that he’d been experience a lot of emotional turmoil, and had been having difficulty coping. Having these creatures to enjoy and care for was exactly what he needed:

Things began to get a little dramatic, but that’s okay. Who wouldn’t be dramatic about suddenly becoming a father?

Zarcilla disappeared for a little while to commune with the beasts and grapple with his emotions:

People were completely taken in by the story, and are still following it with baited breath. There are some issues.

A lot of people pointed out that the mama cat may not belong to Zarcilla, but she could belong to someone who is looking for her. Many suggested he take her to get scanned to see if she has a chip. He wrote in other tweets that he called a veterinarian who said she shouldn’t be separated form her babies yet, and they’d need to wait to bring her in. No one had a portable scanner. Basically, Zarcilla is realizing he may not be able to keep his bounty… but he might make a run for it with his kittens.

Becoming a cat dad changes things. We’ll have to watch and see what he decides to do, but hopefully he gets to be the father to at least one of these sweet babies.

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People Are Putting Their Friends On Blast For The Horrible Photos They Take Of Them

Everyone always wants to look and feel their best. Not everyone wants to do the work that it requires to actually do this, so instead, you rely on some clever finagling to achieve this effect.

Maybe you won’t diet and work out or stick to a strict skin care routine, but you can convince the rest of your friends on social media you’re fabulous by picking the right photo filters, lighting, and angles to pull off the aesthetic you’re going for, which so happens to be one that puts you in a more desirable light.

I don’t think I need to really explain how much of a difference a good photographer makes when snapping photos. Even a structure as iconic and beautiful as the Eiffel tower can look vastly different when you’ve got a pro behind the lens.

In fact, even if you are taking care of yourself and have positively glowing skin and are wearing a cute outfit, you’ll have that one friend who will absolutely ruin your photo and make you look like a troglodyte.

And the worst part is that you take such beautiful works of art for them. And while you might not be able to get cute pictures of yourself from your besties, you can at least be consoled by the fact that you’re not alone in the awful photo-snapping struggle.

People are sharing the photos they’re taking of their friends, versus the one they’re getting in return.

It could be that they don’t care as much as you do, or that they don’t spend as much time getting that perfect shot, whatever it is, there are a lot of people out there incensed at their friends for taking awful photos.

There’s focus issues.

Inefficient use of lighting.

I mean you go all-out for your friends, finding the right angles, going to some crazy lengths.

Their “candid” photos also end up looking like total butt.

It’s almost like they do it on purpose.

Or they wait until you’re completely caught off guard.

Do they just not understand what proper lighting looks like, or…?

The disrespect of this one is just completely next level.

I think it just boils down to the amount of time they’re willing to spend.

The phenomenon is obviously a well-known meme, because it’s so heavily steeped in reality.

Tell your friends to shape up, either that, or make enough money for a pro photographer to follow you on your outings.

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Roseanne Blamed Her Racist Tweets On Ambien And Ambien Was Not Cool With That

If you’ve been living under a rock the past 24-hours, you may not know that Roseanne Barr got her show canceled after she tweeted something so racist and awful ABC executives could no longer pretend to not know about it. Though the reboot of Roseanne has had excellent ratings, the character of Roseanne is very different from her namesake. The fake one is a Trump supporter, but maintains a fairly respectful discourse with the people around her. The real Roseanne tweets that a former Obama advisor is an “ape,” and that Chelsea Clinton is related to George Soros.

They’re different people, but only one them makes money off a TV show. The recent string of racist and conspiracy theory racist tweets got the reboot cancelled on Tuesday, and though she apologized, it was too late.

“Roseanne’s Twitter statement is abhorrent, repugnant and inconsistent with our values, and we have decided to cancel her show,” ABC Entertainment president Channing Dungey told Variety.

After the backlash, Roseanne initially said she’d get off Twitter:

That hasn’t happened at all! In fact, she’s doubling down harder, and fighting with her fake TV children who renounced her racist comments.

But before it got there, Roseanne Barr also tweeted that it wasn’t that she was horribly racist when she said all those awful things—it’s that she was on Ambien, a sleeping pill, but still awake enough to hit send.

“It was 2 in the morning and I was ambien tweeting,” she wrote. “It was memorial day too-i went 2 far & do not want it defended-it was egregious Indefensible. I made a mistake I wish I hadn’t but…don’t defend it please.”

This tweet has also been deleted, but Barr is still getting dragged over it, probably because people feel that she’s been racist for years and years.

And then the makers of Ambien, Sanofi, stepped in to clarify what the exact side effects of racism are:

There you go. 

People are loving a company getting in on the dragging action. The Dictionary was next:

And other people are wondering what Ambien will do to them:

But mostly everyone is mocking Roseanne’s ridiculous claims:

Would Ambien change white supremacist David Duke’s outlook on the world for the better? Almost certainly not, but an interesting theory from Patton Oswalt:

Roseanne doesn’t like the jokes:

But they’re still coming:

Meanwhile, people are reaching out to the rest of Roseanne‘s cast to see if they want to work together:

Racism is a helluva drug.

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These Are The Pettiest Venmo Charges People Say They've Ever Received

Writer Nicole Cliffe asked her many followers for the pettiest Venmo requests they’ve ever received or sent. If you’re not familiar with it, Venmo is an app that makes it easy to send money to people from your bank account, and it can come in handy when splitting bills or making utility payments to your roommates. But anyone who knows your handle can send you a request for cash—which you can also refuse. There’s also a social media element, so if you don’t set those requests to private, anyone you’re connected with can see all the back-and-forth drama over toilet paper, or whatever. The potential for drama is there, because drama follows humanity from app to app.

In Cliffe’s opinion, it is fair to Venmo request something when it was discussed, but springing a Venmo request on someone out of the blue is forbidden!

People responded with total delight, because this stuff happens all the time. It particularly seems to happen when it comes to food, like shared meals. And I don’t mean at restaurants. People are charging for dinner parties they throw at their own homes!

There are also often arguments over alcohol and drugs, as there are in the real world:

But all of those may be put to shame by this story of someone tabulating the shared cost of a tablespoon of salsa:

I like that story because it implies you can get money for the old condiments in your fridge.

But there were more tales of drama involving relationships, including a few that had people wondering why they paid the requesters? Reject that!

But the real answer is that interpersonal drama and pettiness was not invented by an app. This particularly hilarious tale of a dinner party gone terrible wrong involved handwritten notes:

Lots of people got Venmo’d after dates that went badly, which might actually be a good thing. It proves you were wrong to go on a date with them in the first place.

This story left me with a lot more questions than answers:

But this is my favorite, because it’s a tale of pettiness that was completely justified:

I wish I could charge everyone for all the horrible stuff I’ve seen on the Internet.

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People Are Sharing What You Should Accomplish By 35 And It's Hilarious

If you feel like your parents and grandparents had a much better handle on their finances back when they were your age, you’re not wrong

Millennials have less money saved in the bank, are owning less homes, and are in more debt than previous generations. It doesn’t help that average wages haven’t been raised enough to match average living costs, either and don’t even get me started on the soaring costs of university educations despite their alarming drop in quality.

It’s enough to make you feel a little bit hopeless, especially when you see articles like this that say by the age of 35, you should have twice of your salary in savings.

Which elicited the kinds of replies from people on Twitter that you’d expect.

Simply because I hardly know anyone who’s 35 years old or close to that age that has anywhere near double their salary in savings.

So, in typical millennial fashion, people began writing what 35-year-olds actually have accumulated by the time they reached the golden three decades-and-a-half marker.

They’re painfully relatable.

Some of them are so on the nose you’d swear people were in your house, watching how you live.

Others are just scary realizations.

There were those that got just too real.

I mean way too real.

Some were more terrifying than others.

I’d like to add to this next one that some of the tupperwares have impossible to remove sauce stains.

There’s this job application one that’ll just make you flat-out cry.

We’ll never go and search through all of those old files, but it’s comforting to know that they’re all there.

Friendships look a lot different when you’re 35.

There are some people who come into their own at different times, however.

Snow and flu season are gifts from the excuse gods.

Replace that with some old navy blue prisoner pants for me and we’re on the same page.

Being 35 also entitles you to a certain snobbery of sorts.

As well as certain anxieties.

Any artist or creative knows exactly what this dude is talking about.

So many unkept promises to yourself.

Some of them were oddly specific.

Cable is unnecessary. Stream a billion things instead.

And of course, the only thing you should really accomplish by 35 is whatever you need to do.

Not what’s comfortable or easy for you, but what plagues you on a daily basis. What you know you should do, day in and day out. That’s what you need to do by 35.

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